The Final 10

What would you do with the last 10 days of a person’s life that was closest to you? Now that I know, here are 10 things that I did:

1. We talked everyday

2. Got some important guidance about how to handle a relationship.

3. I Paid for our last meal together.

4. Waited in the airport for over 2 hours for them to arrive with 3 times the luggage.

5. Spent time with them interacting with their siblings. 

6. Postponed a business trip by one day to spend some critical time with them.

7. Went on a late night store run for snacks to a place that I don’t like shopping. 

8. Served as a chauffeur in Southern California.

9. Spent the day sharing babysitting duties.

 10. Honored the absolute very last request of pinning up her hair and agreeing to let them sleep in the next morning. 

I did not know it would be the last 10 Days of my mother’s life nor did I want it to be.   As a daughter, I have taken the time to grieve in a manner that has been productive for me so that I will not have any regrets about the choices I made as a daughter. I can honestly let you know that my relationship with my mother grew into a perfect fit for us. I was not at my mother’s funeral with my lips turned up because someone got up there speaking  falsehood about my mother’s life. I was blessed that I actually knew the person they were talking about.

I was fortunate to have many friends that had lost a parent early in life and it really helped a lot sista out. From the advice on how to cope with the emptiness, from people who made a choice to totally divorce their family only to be reunited because of death really became helpful when my mother died. I will say every person’s grief journey is unique and personal. The only thing I would tell you from my experience is, you never know when the final 10 days will be… Make the most of each day.

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